A Gentle Reconnection

I intuitively understood

that if I was going to reconnect

with my heart,

I would need to risk setting down

old ways of coping

and moving through

a whole lot of fears.

What I had found was subtle

and tender, and i just knew

if I was to return to any form

of numbing or distraction,

I would miss something I wasn’t

willing to let go of again.

I had come too far.

And so the decision was made,

and that first step into

what I later called a prayer break

was taken.

The respite found immediately

was a vast contrast

to all of the striving and searching

and disconnect I had experienced.

I never turned back.

After a while my life existed within

an expanded prayer break,

a gentle reconnection 

with a deeper part of me

and a return to the natural flow

of life, which I experienced as

a continuous transformation into