Tag: wholeness

A Gentle Reconnection

Tenderness September 19, 2019

I intuitively understood

that if I was going to reconnect

with my heart,

I would need to risk setting down

old ways of coping

and moving through

a whole lot of fears.

What I had found was subtle

and tender, and i just knew

if I was to return to any form

of numbing or distraction,

I would miss something I wasn’t

willing to let go of again.

I had come too far.

And so the decision was made,

and that first step into

what I later called a prayer break

was taken.

The respite found immediately

was a vast contrast

to all of the striving and searching

and disconnect I had experienced.

I never turned back.

After a while my life existed within

an expanded prayer break,

a gentle reconnection 

with a deeper part of me

and a return to the natural flow

of life, which I experienced as

a continuous transformation into

tenderness.

Within the Stillness of My Self

Tenderness April 30, 2018

There was a continuous movement within the stillness of my true Self. It was the softening of all parts of me that had felt separate and lost in repetitive cycles of emotional pain.

I had reached the place of enough is enough and decided to find my way to tenderness. Tenderness came out of the realization I was reliving the exact same old pain I had vowed to never feel again. It came out of the last bit of gathered strength to try one more time to hold and honor it instead.

With Love

What's Right Here July 7, 2017

I hold

what is here

with love —

the natural unfolding,

this clear space,

the reverence —

all of this,

including all that is

painful and confusing.

Even as I feel

the shifting ground

beneath me,

I accept and love

all of it

as it is —

right here.

I know these arms

have held

the indescribable pain

of separateness,

reaching inward

and through —

daring to hold

ALL of the pieces

of their own

shattered heart

even before it was

clear they were

not broken —

because somewhere,

underneath the confusion,

a quiet prayer was

whispered.