Quiet Reflections and Prayers
It wasn’t always graceful,
but I learned
how to hold on
a little more tightly
when needed
and to let go
of preformed ideas
of how life should go.
And it was
the subtle little treasures
I would have missed
by taking an easier path
that always brought me
back to my true essence
and to peace.
There wasn’t time, really.
And there was no way
to be sure
that it would be
worth the risk.
But to my surprise,
after jumping in,
I found what I had
longed for
and hidden most deeply
there, in each moment,
just beneath the surface —
not far at all.
I learned to hold
and let go
of all of my experiences —
to hold a little longer
until all that was painful
was transformed
into something beautiful.
And then I remembered
how to listen directly
to silence.
In the center
of my heart,
I found
no concepts
and no words,
only the purest essence
of all of my experiences.
And though there was
the sense
of a returning
from the focused holding
in that place,
I found it was
and had always been
what was most true.
I had only forgotten.
When there were
no words,
I was silent.
And when there was
more than I could process,
I tossed it all
back up
and waited again
for the pieces
to fall back down
a little more slowly.
Sometimes I hold
just to see
what is here,
beneath the surface —
where it is safe now
to disappear.
I vowed to hold
all that appeared
for as long as it took,
to keep my focus
on what was
most real and true.
And ever so softly,
letting go
of unneeded pieces,
holding on
to the subtle messages
only my heart understood,
I crossed over
to the place
where quiet whispers
carried me —
where words couldn’t go.
And so life continued
to unfold
as it had been.
And having let go
of the need to understand
or express
in that moment,
I held
each whispered prayer
as it appeared.
And I became
the wholeness
that had carried me
safely back
to the place of no words.
I found
my deepest healing
in meeting all that appeared
as it was —
choosing in each moment
to surrender to
and gently support
the natural unfolding
of life.
And I found
my deepest comfort
in noticing
the slightest shifting
in silence.
I found my words
always led me back
to emptiness.
And though each time
I dreamed
of what it would be like
to follow a different path,
I knew
by the purity of Love
and the combination
of delight and relief
quieting my soul
that this must be
where I would have
ended up
either way.
Laurie's Notes 