Quiet Reflections and Prayers
I vowed to hold
all that appeared
for as long as it took,
to keep my focus
on what was
most real and true.
And ever so softly,
letting go
of unneeded pieces,
holding on
to the subtle messages
only my heart understood,
I crossed over
to the place
where quiet whispers
carried me —
where words couldn’t go.
And so life continued
to unfold
as it had been.
And having let go
of the need to understand
or express
in that moment,
I held
each whispered prayer
as it appeared.
And I became
the wholeness
that had carried me
safely back
to the place of no words.
I found
my deepest healing
in meeting all that appeared
as it was —
choosing in each moment
to surrender to
and gently support
the natural unfolding
of life.
And I found
my deepest comfort
in noticing
the slightest shifting
in silence.
I found my words
always led me back
to emptiness.
And though each time
I dreamed
of what it would be like
to follow a different path,
I knew
by the purity of Love
and the combination
of delight and relief
quieting my soul
that this must be
where I would have
ended up
either way.
It’s a little funny
the long journey
to nowhere really,
following the invisible path
into the heart
that ends up
right back here,
finding so much
and holding on
to nothing,
setting out
to gather,
to share —
knowing then to be
silent.
I held
whatever appeared
without judgement,
without needing
a particular outcome.
And I found
I had reconnected
with the part
of me
that was most healed.
And all that
was most in need
of holding
dissolved each time
a little more
into a tender vulnerability
I would never regret
having found.
I held
all.of the pieces
I couldn’t quite
fit together,
not knowing
what the outcome
would be —
silently vowing
to trade my shields,
to risk it all —
to face my own vulnerability
for the hope
of a subtle shifting
that would bring
all of me back
to the place
where I was
unbroken —
however long
it took.
I have held and honored —
set it all down —
watched as it faded back
into nothing.
I have waited
as the perfect pieces
reappeared.
And I have forgotten
and pushed —
tried to make
my own inner art
into something else —
more.
I have forgotten
the importance of the holding
and remembered
as, in my frustration,
it found its own way
and revealed itself to me
again.
On the journey
into my heart,
there were words
that couldn’t be written
or shared.
With each one
came a little more
letting go
and the understanding
that it was, in fact,
in the silent spaces,
held and known
in my own heart
alone,
that I found
the deepest connection,
meaning,
and desire to continue on.
I found comfort in knowing
that the words I did write
would always find
their way back
to the silent space
from which they emerged.
I honor the place
within
where there is
nothing
to sort
or heal —
where it’s enough
to be
as I am.
Laurie's Notes 