Tag: awakening

Reflections

My Greatest Hope

Laurie's Notes

It wasn’t about

trying so hard

to create,

really.

Healing my own

shattered heart

was an art,

not a formula.

It took the strength

of each piece

risking to trust

when it would have

made more sense

to turn away.

It took the strength

to reach

and to hold

with open hands —

without grasping

or needing to avoid

being left

alone

in my reaching

while praying

to God that

wouldn’t happen.

It was a risk

that at a certain point

had become

my greatest hope.

Waiting for Words

My Own True Voice

Laurie's Notes

I began to listen

with my heart

to words

reflecting my own

inner knowing.

There was a calling forth

and allowing of

my own true voice

to flow out

though my own

unique experiences

and join

with others

in such a way

as to form

a symphony

of clear sound

and the accompanying

pauses.

I began to

see my own small part

and those around me

as connected

and important —

leading us safely

through all that was

unclear.

Continuing On

Entangled

Laurie's Notes

I honor

all parts and pieces

of a heart

that showed itself

to be strong

and vulnerable,

suffering

and whole —

all at once.

I honor them all

because they refused

to sink quietly

into the back corners

of a heart that was

rightly their own.

I honor them because

the journey

was too much

for any one part

alone —

because turning back

or becoming stuck

would have been

easier.

Still they continued on

through the unknown —

refusing to give up

hope

that their seemingly small

bodies and actions

could reach

and lead each other

to the truth —

however entangled

it had become.

Reflections

For an Instant

Laurie's Notes

There was a kind

of strength

that came out

of my deepest pain

and mixed with the

tenderness

shattered pieces of

my own heart had

worked so hard

to push down —

because they sensed

the amount of truth

they would cry out

was too much

for any one piece

to hold —

but they were never

seperate, really.

This strength found

a way

to reach up

just once more

when it had been

pushed down

too many times

to count.

This strength stood

and looked

at all that was

painful and terrible —

straight in the face.

And it vowed

to feel its own part

in it.

It agreed to keep reaching

because it had felt

the reaching back

of a hand

holding that same fear

that shook

in its own —

if only for

an instant.

Continuing On

In Exchange for Beauty

Laurie's Notes

My deepest posture

became one

of reverence.

I found my deepest

self could endure

much shaking

on the surface.

It could honor all

parts of the whole,

without clinging

to a set of ideas

I had thought

myself to be

for a while.

It was no longer

about winning.

It was about

finding a way through

a natural process,

where I had the

chance to participate

in my own evolution —

reaching for a hand —

encouraging others

through my willingness

to face

my own hidden pain

that was entangled

with theirs —

setting down

a false

sense of self

and bits of pride

in exchange for

natural beauty

and connection.

It was the hardest

and most simple thing.

Reflections

In-between

Laurie's Notes

When I really

got down to it,

the healer

in me

desired the same thing

as the part of me

hidden beneath

layers of distraction.

Parts of me

had gotten lost

in trying so hard

to protect

and process

as best they could,

while believing they were

separate.

The further away

they got,

the more attention

they demanded —

leading to a never-ending

struggle.

Relief came

in each moment

as I stood,

not as those fractured

pieces,

but as the whole —

reaching back

and embracing

that hidden part

that knew her own

voice —

welcoming

and releasing

all that stood

in-between.

Quieting

Hope

Laurie's Notes

At a certain point,

the only real option

was going to

the source —

risking it all

to find something

worth holding.

It meant looking

within

and finding

that one thing

I could say

was sacred,

that one thing

worth holding

if everything else

I thought I had

understood

turned out to be

untrue.

I had to know

if there was

hope for any of us.

I had to know if

there was something

to be found

in us

that was capable

of holding

anything pure

without messing it up.

And it turned out

there was.