Words became a gentle
path back into the willingness
to feel and to be a little more
present.
After a while, they began
to echo the silence of
my deepest heart —
winding their way through
old wounds —
soothing whatever appeared
along the way.
It took a little practice
learning how to soothe
all that was within.
It took a huge dose
of gentleness
to become willing to stop
and allow my heart to be
the safe place I had been
trying to find for so long.
After a little while,
I caught on that this
human experience was in fact
a sacred journey.
And so I began to take notes —
connecting the person
to a more expanded,
formless self —
comforting and guiding —
lighting my path
as it unfolded —
navigating through contrast —
following what felt most true —
listening and feeling my way
into my deepest heart.
At a certain point,
the decision was made
to keep going —
through all that needed attention
and healing
so that my experience in the world
more clearly reflected
the peace I held
in my deepest heart.
It was an unshakable
determination to hold my ground
no matter what.
Hold us a little tighter when we can’t find our way — as we can’t see the whole picture, and it’s easy to be frightened of the in-between times from here. Help us to honor all that has felt dishonored in our own hearts — that we might honor all things more deeply. Amen
–Laurie, What Now
There was a quiet connection
within my heart
that never left.
Words flowed from somewhere
beyond time –
comforting and creating
space for healing –
a path through
all that was painful
into a place of ever-evolving
tenderness.
There is a love
that reaches
to the wounded place
inside.
And there is a love
that flows
because it has touched
this reaching —
needing only
to express
its unending gratitude
for its own embrace.
— Laurie, Heart Space
The shifts toward greater alignment with my heart were painfully subtle at times, but I learned that movement is movement. I found any amount of flexibility in my mind and body could be held and carried into more movement and more gentle guiding of unaligned fragments of Self back to the center of my deepest heart — in each moment.
It took a little practice, but I learned to remain in my heart. I learned to honor all that was painful while holding space for tenderness.
I began to sink into my heart a little more each time I remembered I had the option to remain there. Experiences that seemed unhealable at first glance began to reflect the softening in my own heart.
One day I realized the peace I felt had come out of the quiet moments, the insights that came that couldn’t be shared or explained. It had come out of whatever remained of the grief of being within a separate self and the grace of having found my way back to my whole heart.
It was the non-verbal kind of feeling my way through life that had saved me. It was the wisdom beyond stories and questions and answers I found in the silent spaces within that nothing else could reach.
It came out of the willingness to wait forever for words to form and outer forms to match the love I knew in my heart.
