What looked like a dead end
to the path less taken
turned into more of
a vertical journey within,
reflecting outward.
and becoming even more connected
with God and with my own
heart.
There was a gratitude beyond words
for each tiny piece of truth
that added to an unshakeable knowing —
the remembrance of my very essence
that could never be broken —
a tender space
where there had once been
only pain.
I learned to focus
and remain centered within
my heart.
I found respite in the sacredness
when the world around me seemed
unreachable,
and I couldn’t seem
to bridge the gap between my inner
experience and the outer chaos.
The harder I tried,
the bigger it became.
I remembered back to times before
when the only solution I could see
was to let go of my heart
in order to survive and somehow
manage to fit in.
But this time I had traveled too far
and learned too much.
And so the only thing to do,
having reached the end of the path,
was to stand still right there in my heart,
in the middle of the chaos,
and hope for the best.
Even when it seemed like
any sense of inner peace
had been lost,
it was there.
It took only the intention
of entering a state of prayer
to refocus on the present moment
and find the center of my heart —
where I could hear the quiet prayer
that was always there.
Writing became a meditation,
an easily accessible way
to connect with a truer sense
of self —
in any moment.
My notes became precious tickets
back to parts of self
and back into the world.
Even after I reached a point
where I could safely let go,
translating lived experience
into words continued to be
a ticket into the quiet space within
I wouldn’t have traded
for an easier path.
No words were needed each time I found my way to the quiet prayer in my heart.
Words carried there faded with the light of the presence of my own healer Self. The urge to look outward for relief in times of challenge was replaced with the understanding beyond thought found within and reflected outward.
There was a
softening
of the story
on the surface,
a gentle resetting.
The default emotion
become one of
peace,
the very thing
my heart had
longed for
and called me to.
There was a more
natural connection
with all of life,
a gentle unfolding
of the quiet prayer
within my heart.
Silent pauses became
welcome parts
of the relaxation into
a gentler way
of being.
I learned to create
from the inside.
The need to have
questions answered
at once,
a perfect outer
reflection,
and other people’s
understanding
or approval
began to fall
away —
making way for
a deepening peace
to be reflected
outward
from my heart.
There was
comfort in knowing
I was deeply connected
with my heart.
Things that once
caused me to
feel lost
now reinforced
the feeling of
inner connectedness.
Life around me
began to reflect
a deeper kind
of peace.
But it was
the feeling of being
forever connected
within
that gently carried me
as I continued on.
After a while,
I found I could
reach a little past
the surface
of what appeared.
I found I could
connect with
a peace independent
of outer
reflections.
I found my deepest
healing in the space
rediscovered,
a little more in each
moment —
within my heart.
There was something
sacred
in having healed
to the core,
the memory of
the veering off
from the more widely
traveled path,
and the gentle way
it seemed
to circle back
to reach the most
tender treasures
surrendered
along the way.
Laurie's Notes 