For the times
when there are
no words
to express what is
in our hearts,
give us courage
to hold
the quiet spaces
in-between.
Amen
Tag: recovery
My Greatest Strength
And so my heart
grew weary of the search
for some kind of
relief
from the story
being told on the surface
through the eyes
of the wounded places
in me.
And so its quiet,
wordless whispers
and its ability
to sink in a little deeper
became louder.
And my willingness
to listen
a little more intently
became my greatest strength.
For a While
For a while,
I searched for
a way out
of suffering.
And then,
by grace,
I learned
the way out
was always
straight through
and a little deeper
down.
With Honor
I found
my deepest comfort
in the sinking down
into the places
I had tried so hard
to heal.
I found peace
in the willingness
to look a little past
what was appearing
on the surface
and in the subtle shift
from the desire
to heal
into the desire to hold
with honor.
A Peace That Never Left
It was in the willingness
to stand still
for just a moment
when there was no time
to stand still,
to stop trying so hard
to be better,
to meet whatever appeared —
even if it was nothing
at all.
It was in the persistence
of holding my ground —
even if that very ground
seemed shakey
and dissolved
into the nothing.
It was here
that I found a peace
that never left.
An Unspoken Truce
At a certain point,
it became clear
that relief must come
at once,
in the form of
a respite,
an unspoken truce —
in the middle of
all that remained
unhealed
and unsettled.
And so I entered
the place beyond thought.
And though the energy
of what was held there
was often intense,
it was always tender
to sink a little
further in,
to be willing
to allow the uneasiness
to be there
and to subside,
to see this place
outside of me —
to be okay
no matter what.
A State of Prayer
I found
it was possible
to hold
all that appeared
for however long,
however intense
life on the surface became —
however hard it shook.
I found it was possible
to hold my ground
a little deeper down
and to reach
a little further out.
I found all things
were shifted
with this willingness
to be
in a state of prayer.
Let Me Be Empty
Lead me safely back
to my Self.
Teach me how
not to follow a thought.
Remind me
of the beauty
that exists
just below the surface.
And when it is
time for words,
let them
always be new.
Help me to set down
conditioned thinking
and the need
to be wise
or to be
anything at all.
Let me be
empty instead.
Amen
Either Way
Sometimes there are
no words.
And sometimes
they just come.
I can’t say
which it will be.
But I will show
up either way.
Where Nothing Is Too Much
Sometimes the story
on the surface
was too much.
And so I found
I could toss it up
and trust the pieces
to come back down
a little more gently.
And I was thankful
for the quiet
wordless messages
from my heart
that took its place.
I didn’t wish them
to be less subtle anymore
because I knew they came
from that pure place
where nothing is too much.
Laurie's Notes 